Idle Musings | 2008 June

Archive for June 2008

As an avid Moleskine I can’t for mine to arrive so I can start using it.

Splash Dipping Bowls

In Design, Food on Jun-27-2008 with
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What Animals Really Think Of Us

In Humor on Jun-26-2008 with
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DALMATIANS

Hey, look, the truck’s stopping.
Did they take us to the park this time?
No—it’s a fire. Another horrible fire.
What the hell is wrong with these people?

When Amazon Reviews Go Wrong (In A Good Way)

In Humor on Jun-24-2008 with
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Denon actually sells, and if you are not an audiophile I am not joking, a $500 CAT5 Ethernet cable (1.5 meters long). Snarky customer reviews on Amazon are nothing new, but this might be the best by a long shot. Just a few select comments:

Holding this cable in my hands actually makes me feel that much closer to the Lord Jesus Christ. I only make $6.25/hr at Jack In The Box, but I saved up for three months so I could have this cable. It sits in a shrine I constructed next to my futon in Mother’s basement.

The first time I downloaded a picture to the printer over this cable, the bits moved so fast the printer collapsed into a naked singularity, right there in my office.

I accidentally dropped one end of my Denon cable into a glass of Tuscan whole milk I was drinking. Later when I finished my milk (yeah, I still drank it; should I not have done that?), my right arm (lost in an accident in 1987) spontaneously grew back. Is that normal?

After I took delivery of my $500 Denon AKDL1 Cat-5 uber-cable, Al Gore was mysteriously drawn to my home, where he pronounced that Global Warming had been suspended in my vicinity.

If Denon had captured the Divine light of creation and distiled it into 1.5 meters of ultramegaradioactive copper, it could not have been better than this cable. Just holding the packaging it comes in, I can see distant galaxies and, though you may not believe it, hear what the aliens there are thinking.

I think Monster will probably sue because they came up with the original idea of ripping off the public and now Denon is stealing their concept.

[Found via Boing Boing]

George Carlin, Dead @ The Age Of 71

In Culture, Humor, Video on Jun-23-2008 with
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Religion convinced the world that there’s an invisible man in the sky who watches everything you do. And there’s 10 things he doesn’t want you to do or else you’ll sent to a burning place with a lake of fire until the end of eternity. But he loves you! And he needs money! He’s all powerful, but he can’t handle money! […] I’ve begun worshipping the sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the sun. It’s there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, a lovely day. There’s no mystery, no one asks for money, I don’t have to dress up, and there’s no boring pageantry. And interestingly enough, I have found that the prayers I offer to the sun and the prayers I formerly offered to God are all answered at about the same 50-percent rate. […] Religion is sort of like a lift in your shoes. If it makes you feel better, fine. Just don’t ask me to wear your shoes. And let’s not nail the lift to the natives’ feet.”

Rest in peace George. RIP. The world needs people that will say things that are not popular. Say things that make you or me uneasy, even angry or downright furious. Maybe even something that might make you think about a topic from an entirely different perspective. And yes even downright offend you. But do all of this in an intelligent manner, not just to offend for pure shock value. One less of these rare people are with us today.

BTW: Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits!

Oh How I Would Like To Hand This Out

In Humor on Jun-23-2008 with
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Best Cameo Off All-time You Ask

In Music on Jun-23-2008 with
1 Comment

Well that would be Alec Baldwin’s “coffee for closers” speech in Glengarry Glen Ross. And I am not the only person that thinks so. I don’t even think there is a close second.

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